Thursday, February 27, 2014

*sigh*

I've been a bit MIA this week.  I sort of have things to write about, but I'm mostly just feeling blah.  Read the rest of this post at your own risk.  I'm in the mood to vent.  I've been thinking about this post for a couple of days.  I want you to know that things aren't always glamorous and lovely over here at Rebeckann's Random Thoughts.

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First of all, let's go back to the same thing I've been whining about since December.

It's cold.  It's REALLY FREAKING COLD.  And I'm SICK to death of snow.  And dark.  I want sunlight, 75 degrees.  I just want to take my garbage to the cold without freezing my butt off, and not have to worry about being late for work because my stupid windshield won't defrost.

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Excuse the language, but seriously, this sums me up perfectly about now.
Winter is not about to let up any time soon.  It's highly likely that Sunday into Monday night we're in for another huge snow storm.

Where I live is in that "lovely" pink area. GRRR
I'm tired.  I just want to sleep, but mostly during the day.  Night time comes around, and I'm on the computer or my iPad.  Sadly, my job kind of gets in the way of this schedule.

I'm also angry.  Pretty much all of the time.

In general, I really do love my job.  I like teaching 6th grade reading, and (quite surprisingly) I love teaching my math class.  It's the brightest moment of my teaching day.  Unfortunately, it's first period so my day goes downhill after that.

BUT I'm so angry.





I am sick and tired of how disrespectful these kids are!  I'm angry that parents are raising kids who do not respect their teachers and other adults.  I'm angry that people are not placing a higher priority on their children's education, and I'm even angrier that these kids brag about their FAILING grades!!!  Very rarely have I heard a student shout out, "I got a 100!!" after I pass back a test.  What I usually get is, "HAHA!  I failed!" or "I got a 30! HAHAHA!"  I always hand back tests--good or bad---upside down so that students can keep their grades private.  There's no REASON for these kids to "brag" about their bad grades.  No one has to know!  I just don't get it.  I was HORRIFIED when I got B's on tests.  I would never have announced to my whole class that I failed. 

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Even worse than that is always feeling like it's MY fault when the students aren't doing well.  But they don't care.  They don't try.  And if you DO get a parent who shows an interest, they insist that it's my fault.

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The other problem is that consequences just don't seem to bother these kids!  I had a student in ISS for a half day today.  He slammed his cafeteria tray against the (PLASTIC) garbage can so hard, that he broke the tray.  Then he LAUGHED about it.  He was not even phased when he came in this morning and I told him.  This same kid has over 11bench times for our field trip in May! (Bench time is time that they must sit out from our field trip to a local amusement park.  Each bench time is 15 minutes.  Our field trip is about 4 hours.  Right now, he has already lost 2 hours and 45 minutes.

I JUST DON'T GET IT!

I'm stuck in this terrible rut.  I weigh more now that I ever have in my entire life.  While I really do love wearing leggings, I wear them almost all of the time because I only have 1 pair of dress pants that fit.  Most of my jeans are pretty questionable right now, too.




I know that I should be working out.  I WANT to work out, but I'm just so tired.  And I just want to eat....




I don't like how my body looks right now, and I honestly know that I feel better when I do work out.  But I just can't get off of the couch.



Finally, my house is a disaster. I want to clean. I NEED to clean. Have I mentioned that I'm tired?


I hope I still have some of you with me.  If  you stuck around with me until the end of this post, thank you.  I'm sorry for being a Debbie Downer.  I just needed to get this out, and I hope I'm right in thinking that most of you will understand!

8 comments:

Unknown said...

<3 (((hugs)))

Anonymous said...

Hang in there, girlfriend. I'm with you. Vacation to Florida, anyone?

~Anchored In Christ~ said...

things will get better hun. as for the kids in your class who dont act right. sounds like if their parents would have wooped their ass a long time ago then they wouldn't have turned out like that.

It would rock my socks off if you'd join the blog challenge. should be fun. http://hotpinkowl02.blogspot.com/2014/02/blog-challenge.html

Kristin said...

It sounds like Seasonal Affective Disorder to me.
I also must say that I had a terrible day at school today. The kids are awful. I call home and parents don't care or they don't have phone numbers that work. I could write a book on the students I have this year. Maybe this is why I need to keep switching schools…what I've learned this year is that I have absolutely no respect for parents who don't take care of their children, physically/emotionally/academically. For example, I have 2nd graders who can't read. These same kids are involved in extra curricular activities, like Girl Scouts. I keep saying to Scott, "If our child couldn't read at 8 years old, would they be out selling cookies on Saturday?", just to make sure I'm not crazy and don't expect too much or something. Heaven forbid we take school seriously…
Anyway…
I hope Friday is a better day!

Rachel Ross said...

Ugh I'm so sorry that this winter has been so crappy for you. This past trip I seriously contemplated how we can make a "snowbird" life work for us, haha! And I have nothing but the utmost respect for teachers. I hate that parents blame teachers nowadays when so many problems lie within their parenting and not holding their children accountable for their actions. Hugs to you! Hope the next couple weeks are better! :)

Susannah said...

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way!!! I sent up a prayer for you! I wish I had words of wisdom or something like that but there's really nothing to say! I just hope things get better. :-)

Sarah Alway said...

Aw, I hate to read about you getting so down on yourself! But I often get in similar funks during the winter. I think it's normal. Then, eventually, the sun starts to come out, and you start to feel better. Hang in there!!

And although it will date me, it has to be said... what the heck is wrong with kids these days?!?!

Caitlin Cavallaro said...

Did I write this post? Oh wait, I wasn't sure because literally this is EXACTLY. HOW. I. FEEL. ON. THE. DAILY. And I couldn't agree more with the disrespectful students. Your child who doesn't care is failing, you're a bad teacher. That parent who never returns your request for a parent conference, you're a bad teacher. That student you tutor who still doesn't pass, you're a bad teacher. That student with such bad behavior and constantly makes poor decisions and doesn't care, you're a bad teacher. SO OVER IT! It's mentally, physically and emotionally draining!!!!!!

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